Eph. 5:21
submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Certainly the primary motive for this mutual submission is reverence for Christ. But are there factors which grow this attitude in a believer? Perhaps the verses that immediately precede this verse are there specifically because they do just that.
v. 18 states be filled with the Spirit. The Spirit's filling is preeminent. Without it the Christian life is not even possible. It would only be through the Spirit's filling that self can be crucified allowing submission to others to become a pleasing development. The Spirit must control every aspect of the believer's life, growth, and relationships.
v. 19 says that believers are to address one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with all your heart. First and foremost these are evidences of the Spirit's control in the believer's life. But imagine if this were the everyday mental set and language default of every believer. What a difference it would make! This close connection with the Lord and attitude of worship would usher in a whole range of godly behavior, behaviors that would include submission to other believers.
v. 20 says giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, A thankful heart for God means being thankful for everything, including an attitude of submission to others. The attitude of every believer should be one of thankfulness every minute of every day.
But the problem for all of this is self. My 'self' is motivated and controlled by my flesh. And my flesh is not to keen on giving up its control. That is why I must decide with an act of my will to crucify my flesh so that I can rise in resurrection life. I can't live as a disabled Christian [that is making allowances for my flesh]. I must make it a matter of constant prayer, filling my mind with His word so that I can sing with a melody in my heart to the Lord. His Spirit must control me in everything.
Father,
I confess my flesh is every battling for control of my life. Help me. Teach me how to be filled with Your Spirit so that I can have Your melody in my heart giving thanks constantly and desiring to have an attitude of mutual submission.
In His name,
Amen