Listening, Speaking, and Anger

James  1:19-20

Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger, for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. 

Know this speaks of certainty, of a truth that cannot be disputed. Perhaps a truth that believers will be held accountable for. In spite of the coming rebuke, James identifies his audience as beloved brothers, as those who have received the gospel and who should desire to see the fruit of righteousness in their lives. James' teaching sounds so simple but to anyone who has tried to make it a reality, it is not. Be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger... If we are quick to hear, to listen carefully, many of the frustrations in life would be deterred at the get-go. Why is listening such a hard skill? It is because most people are wanting their wishes fulfilled immediately and their ideas heard first. Even as another person takes a breath, this person is primed and ready to jump into the conversation without listening to the conversation at all. Conversation for him are times when he takes center stage almost forcing people to listen to him. 

Listening by its very nature puts the other person's thoughts and ideas first. If a person is committed to listening and digesting the ideas of another, it would automatically make that person slow to speak giving him time to think before replying. But the non-listener does not want to hear or respond, he merely wants to get his say in first. To be a good listener one must be genuinely interested in others. Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. There is the crux of the matter. Who do we count significant? Sadly, most often it is ourselves. It it were another, we would be listening!

In the conversational process, being slow to anger would mean a person was hearing all sides of the conversation. They would be thinking clearly unclouded by heated emotions. Most often anger results because of unfulfilled wishes, ideas, or statements. When we see our desires not coming to fruition, we become angry. Why? Because all we can think about is our side of the conversation. Instead of an heated emotional response, we could stop and listen to the all the circumstances. Listening and thinking would give time for the heat to cool, for the anger to disseminate, and for the

righteousness of God to be a reality in out lives. Any believer would state emphatically that he wants the righteousness of God to be preeminent in his life. So here is a simple [yet amazingly difficult] plan. Since it is God's plan, we can rest assured that it will be as He says. Be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger. 

Father,

I confess the many times that I have fallen into the trap of demanding my way, of not listening at all, and of having anger control my life. Please forgive. Help me to walk in Your way. Teach me to listen carefully and to want all the facts before anger takes control. I want You to control my life.

In Jesus name,

Amen